Once upon a time, there lived a swan and a frog. No one could match the swan when it came to her beauty. She was also the wisest in the forest where she inhabited. Despite her young age, she had enough enemies around her, but the frog was the most envy of them. Under the mask of friendship the frog turned the swan`s close friend. For the former was warm-hearted and kind she trusted her new companion. However, the frog couldn`t help hating and envying her. He always tried to imitate and prove that he was able to commit more than his friend could.
One day the swan rose and flew into the sky. Her long white wings seemed so attractive that the frog felt jealous again. The more he tried to fly the more frustrated he became. For what he could do was to jump up. Disappointed with his failure his envy turned into anger. It clouded his mind so much that he decided not to give up. So, he climbed the highest mountain and got ready to fly away. At the very top of it, he promised to himself that from that day he would change everything. He would show how perfectly he could fly. Unfortunately, his envy blinded his eyes and got him throw himself from the top. He was right.
Everything transformed from that very moment, but not the way he wished. Anyway, he couldn`t realize it or it was too late when he understood it. He was far away. His body divided into pieces reaching the ground. I`m sure you`re wondering at least to come across such a beginning. I ask you to accept this tale as an illustration of what I`m going to deliver to you. Honestly, we are almost accustomed to merely call something good or bad, but do we always feel what it`s supposed to mean indeed? I`m also aware of one fact: Mostly, we are ashamed to admit our envy. So, foreseeing and respecting your own opinions on the matter. I would like to add.
In my opinion, envy makes us lose control when someone owns what we would like to have. This only fact kept us thinking that we failed or could do nothing. No one would remember the one who was the second to climb the highest mountain. So, instead of envying the first alpinist we have to find another mount to be the first to climb it. I`m not going to turn you into alpinists. It`s merely a metaphor. The mount is what you intend to get or achieve. I`m sure everyone has his or her own mountain in life. Some have the mount of fame money business, etc.
However, the point will never alter. It works for anyone else. There are two questions, which may arise here. First, how to change envy into pleasure. And, how to deal with envious people. Let`s start from the first question. When you envy someone, no matter if you feel jealous or something like that, you seem destroying yourself from inside. The envy “eats” all of your nerves, joy peace of mind everything and you feel empty. To avoid the nuances of envy we have lots of techniques and tips. I decided to share with some of them:
Meditation is the most powerful tool against our enemies named in this book. Meditating you`ll have to gain peace of mind and realize the importance and meaning of your life. While you feel envious about someone or something, you lose some minutes, days, years at most on the object of your envy. It means you lack some years of your life, because of the subject of your envy. Don`t let envy control you, but take control over it yourself. How? Concentrate on self-improving instead of others.
You have a lot to do about yourself. Right now! Admit that your life won`t get better because of envy. On the contrary, it`ll destroy your life… So, keep meditating and stop your inner self-talk, mainly negative ones. Do you know what a negative self-talk is? If not, read on! All of us always think of something. Sometimes we imagine the image of something or somebody. Mostly, we talk to ourselves in our mind. This is our inner dialogue with ourselves. Pay attention to what your inner voice is prompting you. If it`s something positive, keep those words. If not, meditation will help you calm down and change the “wave” of your thoughts.
A definite goal
Henry Ford said: “Whether you believe you can or not, you are right!” He was right absolutely. Have you ever shot from a gun? Do you know how to shoot? What must you aim at? As a psychologist I say that you can`t shoot the bottle if you see the trees grass the sky people around. To shoot the bottle you have to keep the bottle in front of your eyes. So is about your goal. When you have a definite goal, when you feel aspired to achieve something you`ll come to it not immediately, but definitely if you keep trying.
In my opinion, our aim is a map of our life. They can show where we have been or what places we`re going to visit. Now, we can turn to the second more important question. How to deal with envious people? There always can be found people who envy you and subjects of their envy may differ too. Unconsciously because of their envy, they try to disturb or bother you. Even Jesus Christ was the victim of envy. So, how to avoid envy?
Distraction
If anyone envies you it means he or she concentrates his or her attention on you. In order to make them stop envying you must draw their attention to someone or something else. You can retell about someone more successful than you are. You may give an interesting book or a film if you have one. Everything depends on your creativity and imagination here.
The Law of Attraction or Power of mind
What we assume we`ll perceive. So, imagine that you are surrounded by positively thinking people. See how close friends you are in your mind. Make sure that you are maintaining only positive thoughts. This technique is called visualization. It`s a powerful means to get rid of the envious. Don`t imagine only the lack of envy in your life, but visualize your perfect life! What do you really want to do? What do you desire to get?
Reading! Read inspirational and motivational books every time. We have a proverb “From the cradle to the tomb search for knowledge!” The basic knowledge isn`t the Alphabet, physics, or something else. The most important books are the ones, which bring the best out of you, guide you, and inspire you. You may start from my book Inspirational Stories.